EXCLUSIVE PHOTOS:
LONDON - AUTUMN 2005

If it is true that a picture says 1,000 words, here is my 2,000-word essay on my visit to London during the autumn of 2005 -- a visit during which I was fortunate enough to see Pillars Of The Community at the National Theatre, Keane at the London Film Festival, Five Gold Rings (on video tape) at the Theatre Museum, and -- best of all -- meet Damian Lewis himself ...

The Story Behind The Photos ...

Sunday, October 30

I stepped up from Westminster Station onto a London sidewalk. It was a beautiful day. Windy, but sunny and unseasonably warm for October 30. My first vision: Big Ben and the Houses of Parliament stood before me, welcoming me to this wonderful city. I walked across Westminster Bridge, gazing at the Thames and the surrounding, awe-inspiring architecture, and the gigantic, fantastic London Eye. Someone pinch me, I must be dreaming. Am I really here? This has to be a dream.

I had booked tickets to see Keane at the London Film Festival for that evening's screening as well as the matinee the next day. I decided to go early up to Leicester Square, and upon arriving at the cinema, I stood out near the front entrance to watch for a certain gentleman featured in the film who perhaps might grace the cinema with his presence that evening.

While I waited, I overheard some people buzzing about "secret guests" Barricades had been put in place, and I was inside them. The crowd outside of the barricades grew thick with onlookers as the screening time grew closer. Being on the inside of the barricade (and one of the few standing out there who was inside it), I began to get a bit of a sense of what it must be like to be on the receiving end of all of those pairs of eyes on the outside of the barricade. I'm sure some of them were wondering, as they watched me standing and waiting where they could not stand, if I was "with someone" (as in with a celebrity, perhaps an assistant or a significant other). I kind of got a kick out of that, I guess. But "celebrity" to me is such a bunch of vapid crap, I really don't care about it -- not for myself, and not for anyone else. I'm not impressed by it. It's not real. It's all about perception and media hype. It's meaningless. It's the person that matters -- not the persona/personality.

Anyway, I digress. Back on subject. During the last 30 to 15 minutes before the screening, the attendants guarding the barricade began letting in the swarms of ticket holders. I nearly got trampled because the volume of people they were letting in was so thick. They were moving slowly, but it was a dense herd. Still no sign of Damian, Lodge Kerrigan or anyone else recognizable to me. The volume of ticket holders entering had gradually dissipated, and it was about 10 or 15 minutes before 9 pm. I decided I had better go in and find my assigned seat, or I might miss out on the screening all together.

The attendants inside directed those of us going to see Keane downstairs to a screening room. It was still closed with an attendant at the door. Rick Warden (Damian's co-star from Band of Brothers) walked by me a few times while a small crowd of us were waiting by that screening room door. Moments later, an attendant redirected us to another screening room upstairs. We all entered, and I located my assigned seat -- way over on the right side, way up in the back in the next-to-last row.

Soon afterward, I recognized Damian's brother Gareth as he entered the screening room. Not long after that, I recognized their father Watcyn. Some other adults about Damian and Gareth's age were with them -- one of the men might have been their brother William, and one of the women may have been their sister Amanda. The others were possibly the spouses of Damian's three siblings.

Soon, I saw Damian enter with Helen McCrory and Lodge Kerrigan. Pinch me, I'm dreaming. I'm telling myself, yes, he's here in this room. He's right over there. I'm here. I'm in the same room. This is real. This is not a dream. This is not in your head. This is real. This is now. This is real.

Damian and Lodge went and stood along the side of the screening room -- the side opposite from me. There were microphone stands on the stage area in front of the movie screen. A representative from the Film Festival soon took the stage to introduce Damian and Lodge. They joined her on stage, and Damian said something about hoping that we in the audience would stay for the Q&A following the film and then that some of us would join them for a drink afterward. (I thought/hoped he was serious about that -- that there might be some party planned for the entire audience to attend with them somewhere that I didn't know about. (Mind you, at this time I had gone without sleep for 35 hours (I simply couldn't sleep on the plane trip from the States) and was, in my humble opinion, entitled to a little unclear and borderline-delusional thought processing!) But in the end everyone from the screening room had gone but the family and friends, so I quietly left as well without having said a word. He was talking with his family and friends when I left, and I wasn't about to intrude.

I'm getting ahead of myself here. I won't write about the film itself. I did that already back in June after seeing it at the Atlanta Film Festival. Let it suffice to say that even on a second (and third, the next day) viewing of this film, it remains as close to my heart and core as ever. I still cannot find words to articulate my impressions, as this film goes beyond words. I've said it before -- it totally bypasses the part of the mind that articulates and goes straight to your soul. In me, it lives there. And I protect it there, holding it tight as a mother might hold her child to keep safe from anyone or anything that might try to take it away. I won't try to articulate the film, as doing so might start to dissolve some of that feeling. And I don't want that to happen.

The Q&A following the film was wonderful. Quite a few people left, and I was able to move up several rows as a result -- but I was still quite far from the stage. I took a couple of photos. Only one came out with any image on it, and the two figures on stage appear small and are not even recognizable in the picture. I am glad that there were some photo-house images from the Q&A to help compensate me for my own photographic failures that evening.

I wish I had had room in my luggage for a small tape recorder. It would have been great to have recorded the Q&A. I had my notepad with me, but I was too self-conscious to take it out and write notes during the event. Besides, I wanted to keep my eyes focused on that stage -- not on some stupid notepad! I did my best to recall details after returning to my hotel room later that night -- although by the time I started writing notes I'd been awake for 40 straight hours!

During the Q&A, Damian joked that he keeps trying to convince Lodge Kerrigan to do the big Hollywood movies, but he won't budge.

The Q&A covered a lot of ground already covered in various press interviews, such as how Lodge Kerrigan's daughter having run off in a pharmacy had become the impetus for the story, the research and patient interviews that Lodge Kerrigan and Damian had done in preparing for the film, and so on.

One person commented on how well Damian does American accents. He said something about working with a dialect coach to help make it regional to the New Jersey area and not California like Ronald Reagan.

Damian joked around a lot throughout the Q&A. I noted in my notes written later that evening that I wished I could recall the specifics better. Now that it is weeks later, it is even harder to remember. But luckily, I jotted down this delightful example of his levity: Before answering one of the questions, he said something along the lines of "my friends in the audience will know how much of this answer is bullshit."

I wanted to participate in the Q&A. I even had a question or two in mind to ask. But I never got up the nerve. I was extremely disappointed in myself over that.

Monday, October 31

My seat at the Monday matinee screening of Keane was the exact front-row-center seat. Why couldn't this have been my seat last night instead? That was all I could think when I realized there were no microphone stands this time, no introduction, no Q&A, no Damian this afternoon -- not in person, anyway. But still, I wrapped my heart around the film on the screen once more, embracing it into my soul for a third time. At the conclusion, despite there being no human recipient for it in the room, the audience applauded.

I need to back up a bit here: Before going to the Odeon West End for that 1:30 matinee, I had walked to the National Theatre at about noon to find my way around that facility and to pick up my tickets for the week, and to purchase a few items in the bookshop: a programme and a book version of the play as translated by Samuel Adamson. All around the outside of the building, display cases featured posters of all of the current productions including Pillars Of The Community. Some of the posters featured the photo of Damian with Lesley Manville, while others had the photo of the railroad (which is also featured on the book). I took a photo of the Damian-Lesley poster near the theatre entrance. But unfortunately, I had to use a flash on this very cloudy day, and the flash reflected off of Damian's face through the glass covering the poster.

That night, Halloween Night, will forever have a completely different meaning for me. It was on this night, in 2005, when I met and had a private, one-on-one conversation with Damian Lewis -- just he and I in the crisp London night air. But let me begin at the beginning, for first came the play.

I was among the first to enter the Lyttleton Theatre that evening (big surprise, eh?!) I had arrived at the theatre complex fairly early, so I walked around to the stage door. I waited a bit, but Damian most likely had arrived earlier. So I decided to proceed to my seat inside the Lyttleton. The room was awash with the sounds of ocean waves embracing the shoreline and carefree seagulls calling out while soaring along in the soft, caressing sea breeze. The stage was dark, but the set, the central room of the Bernick home, was visible. Soon, several cast members in costume were quietly moving about on the set adding the furniture and decorations. This continued as the rest of the audience filtered in to the well-lit seating area to locate their seats and settle in for the performance. By the time they finished arriving, the house was completely full. Before long, the grandfather clock on stage began to chime, the actors in the first scene were in their places, the orchestra began to play, and the lights dimmed in the house and grew brighter on the stage. ...

Having read the play some weeks back, I was aware that Karsten Bernick (Damian's character) does not appear for a while into the first act. So I had some time to prepare for that moment and to enjoy the feeling of seeing a play performed live -- something I, sadly, hadn't done in many years, despite always having enjoyed live performances, whether they were Broadway musicals, community theatre productions or high-school dramatic endeavors.

He enters, swiftly through a door on the right -- my side of the stage. I have that "pinch me, I must be dreaming" feeling again. He is wearing attire quite similar to Soames Forsyte, but without the pasted-down hairstyle of Soames. But there's the black topcoat, the black or dark grey waistcoat (we call that a vest in the states, but in the UK a vest is an undergarment!), black trousers, white shirt with the high collar and the type of tie fashionable in those days tied in a bow. And as he prepares to exit through the household door on the opposite end of the stage, he dons a top hat and walking stick. He resembles Soames, apart from the natural hairstyle this time around, but his character is nothing like Soames. Nor would one expect that, especially with Damian performing the roles. He delivers characters with such complete distinction that none ever resembles another. In his hands, the characters aren't characters at all. They are real, and they are as individual as real-life individuals are.

I won't detail the play here, except to repeat that it is wonderful. The full-house audience loved it. I half-expected a standing ovation, but it didn't happen, and I didn't have the courage to start one ... wish I had ...

In going to see the play all week, I was somewhat attuned for differences between the performances each evening. But I barely noticed any. This was clearly a very highly skilled cast -- I knew that already about Damian, but I wasn't familiar with the others. Rarely if at all was a line flubbed or altered, a movement or posture changed, a mark missed or modified. There were a few very minor prop issues -- tonight, a pen (or was it the top of Damian's walking stick? I'm not sure, as after tonight there was no pen in the scene) fell from the table, and Damian picked it up. On Tuesday night, a flower (I think it was a flower) was on the floor, and Damian picked that up as well. And one night a prop (I forget what it was ... perhaps a vase or ashtray) nearly fell of a small table by the door when Damian was either putting down or picking up his gloves from the same table. The next night and thereafter, the troublesome prop was relocated elsewhere.

Other odd occurrences: Monday night, the woman seated next to me had a persistent coughing problem. That must have been annoying to those on stage. But these people were so professional they didn't show any sign of even hearing it, although they had to have heard it. I suppose that they must get used to that sort of thing and get used to not reacting to it. I know the coughing was annoying me, although I politely did not react either. Later in the week (I don't recall which night but it was either Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday), someone's cell phone rang during the performance. That was rather distracting -- a modern sound like that rips you straight out of the 1870s setting of the story and hurls you back into present day. But again, the performers didn't flinch. Kudos to them, and shame-shame to the fool who didn't turn off his or her cell phone before entering the theatre, as requested by the notice in the programme and other publications and notices at the establishment.

Okay, okay, it's long beyond time that I got to the details of my first one-on-one meeting with Damian on the night of Monday, October 31, 2005. And one-on-one is an ideal description. I was the only individual waiting near the stage door after the show (other than the people inside the stage door, who were supposed to be there). I had moved around a bit during the brief time I'd been waiting there, so I was several feet to the left of the door (if facing it). He came out, and he did not see me as he was headed across the street diagonally in the opposite direction, toward Riverside Walk (the scenic walkway that follows along the bank of the Thames). Somehow, I mustered up the fortitude to call out to him, gently and somewhat softly, "Damian? ..." He turned, I did a little wave and started walking toward him, and he started walking toward me. We met up at the curb to the left of the stage door (if facing it). He stood facing me. He was standing in the street, and I was on the sidewalk. We were eye-to-eye, and his face was less than a foot from mine. I gave him the shiny gold gift bag containing some gifts and cards I had brought for him. He thanked me a few times during our ensuing conversation and said "That was really sweet of you."

And yes, I said CONVERSATION. I was absolutely certain that if I had met him that I would freeze up like the proverbial deer in the headlights. It has always happened to me in the past -- even with people I'd met repeatedly. But Damian has a way about him that really puts you at ease. I was as thrilled as I had expected to be, but I was unexpectedly calm at the same time. I actually managed to have an articulate conversation with him and not freeze up or be a blithering idiot. As I handed him the gifts, I told him that "the play was wonderful" and that "Keane is wonderful," and that "I was there this afternoon and the audience applauded -- I wanted to pass that along since you weren't there today."

He said, "So you saw Keane today, too?"

"Yes," I said, "and last night."

"Oh, you were there last night as well?"

"Yes, and I also saw it in Atlanta."

"When did it play in Atlanta?"

"In June at the Atlanta Film Festival."

"Oh, yes. So you went to Atlanta, too?"

"Yes. I live in [place omitted]. Drove [details omitted], saw the movie and drove [details omitted], and it was well worth it."

He smiled, chuckled a bit -- in amazement, I think. I can't remember what he said. I think it was something like "I'm glad you enjoyed it and that you enjoyed the play."

He asked me, "Are you with the official group?" And then, almost to himself as if to correct himself, "You must be."

"I am part of the Yahoo group."

"Are you here with friends?"

"I'm alone right now, but more Yahoo group members are coming later this week -- one from the States, one from Holland and one from the Czech Republic. You'll have your own contingent out here!" He smiled and chuckled at that.

I then asked him if he had known a [name omitted] when he was at Ashdown House School. He paused for a moment, trying to recall. "[name omitted] ... no, I don't think so ... ? ..." Then I handed him a printout of an email and told him, "I had received this email from a [name omitted] from Ashdown trying to get in touch with you. I have a Web site about you, and my email address is on it, and she must have contacted me through that site even though the site says you can't be reached through it." I noted to him that the "[email suffix omitted]" on the email address means she's in [place omitted], and that her name might be [name omitted], from the email address. I then said, "I got this a couple of weeks ago and thought I'd bring it along in case I happened to meet you. I thought she might be an old school friend or something.

He then said, "Ashdown House ... [name omitted] ... yes ... I think I did know a [name omitted]."

He then stepped up on the sidewalk and stood next to me at my left.

I said, "I'm beginning to feel a bit like Ralph Edwards" (of This Is Your Life fame ... I don't know if he caught that reference or not) "or a [height omitted] carrier pigeon." He said something like, "No, it's fine," or "Don't be silly," or something to assuage my embarrassment (although I wasn't embarrassed, I was trying to make a joke ... guess my joke telling needs work! :-) )

Then he asked me, "And what's your name?"

"Ann."

"Ann," he repeated back to me (I can't tell you how thrilling it was to hear him say my name to me!)

Ann [last name omitted]."

"Ann [last name omitted]," he repeated, flawlessly -- nobody can ever say that last name of mine on the first try! Bravo, Damian, I knew you'd be able to do it effortlessly!

Then he adds, "So you have a Web site about me?"

"Yes."

"Do you have the Web address?" (He might have said URL instead of Web address ... I can't remember.)

Smart me, I had brought along a printout of the home page of my site along with one of my specially made "business" cards, which says: "Damian's Dominion", followed by the Web address, followed by "an unofficial Damian Lewis site", followed by my name, address, home telephone number and email address. No one in the world has those cards except for Damian and myself (unless his agency has any or has given any out ... I had sent a few in a note to him via the agency some time ago).

He thanked me for that and for the email from [name omitted] and again for the gifts, and he asked, "How long are you here?"

"For the week. I came for the play. And I was so thrilled to get to see Keane again, too. I had made my travel arrangements before the Film Festival schedule was out. When I found out Keane would be shown while I was here, I was thrilled."

"That's wonderful. So you're here for the week, so I guess I'll see you ... next time?"

"Tomorrow."

"Tomorrow then."

And he smiled and walked off toward Riverside Walk headed north. And I started walking toward Riverside Walk headed south toward my hotel. Then I realized I had forgotten something. ...

"Damian, could I take your picture?"

"Do you have a camera?"

"Yes, just a moment."

As I got my 35mm camera out of my purse and set it up to take the picture, he said, smiling, "That's an old one."

I chuckled, agreed, and I took the photo. Then we each said, "Bye, see you tomorrow." ... He resumed his journey northward, and I floated on air back to my hotel. ... :-)

Tuesday, November 1

The next night, Tuesday night, was Press Night for Pillars Of The Community, so the show started at 7 pm rather than the usual 7:30. The show was as great as it had been on Monday night. Damian voluntarily picked up the pen or tip of walking stick last night, and the flower or whatever it was tonight. Poor dear, always picking up after everyone. ...

After the show, there were about 12 to 15 press people (I assume they were press people) at the stage door, and they went in -- I assume to meet with Damian and the others in the cast, and the director, etc. Gareth was there too, and he went in at the same time as the press people. It was rather cold out that night, and after waiting for some time after the press people had gone in, I decided to leave. Then it rained and got very windy while I walked to the hotel, so I suppose my decision was a wise one for that night.

I should note that all week long I saw television advertisements for ShakespeaRetold, but the ads did not show Damian.

Wednesday, November 2

Wednesday morning was my scheduled appointment to view the video of Five Gold Rings at the Theatre Museum's Study Room at Blythe House in Olympia. But the viewing almost didn't happen. I was there, the librarian set up the equipment (a TV-VCR combo with a headset, which is necessary as the equipment is in room with other machines and other people watching their respective tapes and listening with headsets), and she put in the tape ... and the machine immediately proceeded to eat the tape. She then recalled that the same machine ate their copy of Hamlet (not Damian's Hamlet, thankfully) a week or so before. So she and her colleagues deduced that the machine needed to be temporarily retired until it could be repaired. They also deemed the tape as too far damaged for further use. Fortunately for me (and for them, and for others planning to view this video later this same week), they had another copy -- although this one is time-coded. There were no other headset-compatible machines available -- just a machine which had speakers but did not work with a headset. I suggested that if there were no other headset-compatible machines in the building (the librarian's associate was checking while I asked this), perhaps we could use the speaker-equipped machine and set it up in another room. That turned out to be the agreed-upon solution, although the librarian emphasized that this was truly an exception to the rule.

The play was amazing. I already had read my book copy of it some months back, so I was familiar with the poignant story and the style in which it is presented -- the stark set, the lyrical, not-quite-conversational language, etc. Still, I was mesmerized as I watched Damian and the other cast members bring it to life on stage, on this video. Had I not been in a public place, I would have allowed my emotions to follow their natural course and reach broader spectrums than I could permit in this room at Blythe House. But having to reign in my emotions did not detract from my immense enjoyment of, and emotional engagement with, this play in any way. In the highly erotic love scene between Daniel (Damian) and Miranda (Helen McCrory), the pair remain partially dressed -- enough so that nothing on the body that should remain private from the world is exposed. In the book, these two characters are nude during this scene. Yet their remaining clothed in this production takes nothing away from the scene at all. In fact, it is perhaps even more erotic this way. Their choreography, combined with the sensual music and blue lighting, create a sequence that would put any two lovers in the world in second place to it at best.

For anyone who plans to see this, I strongly recommend bringing Kleenex. This sequence during which Daniel confronts Simon (Will Keen) over what occurred between them when Daniel was 12 years old will tear you up inside. Heart-wrenching is an understatement. Devastating is an understatement. And as for Damian's portrayal throughout this play -- brilliant is an understatement.

On Wednesday night, two Yahoo Group members, Katerina and Debbie, came to see the play. The three of us had planned to try to meet Damian afterward. But when he came outside tonight, he turned right -- the opposite direction from Monday's exit. And unfortunately, this time I was on the other side and a bit further from the door, and Katerina and Debbie were even further away and scattered about. As Damian exited and proceeded up the side street toward Belvedere Road, I tried to get the girls' attention. But by the time they realized what was going on, he was halfway up the side street. I was tempted to call out to him, but he seemed to be a bit hurried, so I didn't. We gathered together and decided to walk up the side street in his direction, but slowly and casually, just observing rather than following or trying to catch up. Further up the side street, he got on his bicycle (with a little red flashing light on the back of it) and rode away.

Thursday, November 3

On Thursday evening, as I was literally just about to step out of my hotel room to go get a take-away meal for dinner, I luckily had the "telly" on Channel 4 for the Richard & Judy show. Guess who was a guest?! None other than Damian, along with Much Ado About Nothing co-star Sarah Parish. They were on from about 5 pm until about 5:15 pm or so. Needless to say, the trip for the take-away was slightly delayed! Damian was wearing a brown or burgundy shirt and jeans and, as always, looked great. They talked about the programme, about the great idea of making Shakespeare more accessible to general audiences and hopefully enticing them to explore more of it, about the experience of portraying a news presenter -- including actually having those earpieces in their ears and listening to the production people (like real presenters do) while they were filming the story to add to the realism of it. Sarah I think said something about how doing that puts an expression on your face that would be hard to create without actually having the working earpiece and all the chatter going on while playing the part. Two very funny clips from the programme were shown. In the first, Beatrice (Sarah) tells Benedick (Damian) he has something in his teeth just before they go on the air for their news programme ... he ends up making this cheesy face mugging in the camera asking the production staff if he has something in his teeth, not realizing that the programme has already gone on the air and the viewers are seeing him make this face! In the second, Beatrice and Benedick are in the studio while a pre-recorded clip of Beatrice taking a belly-dancing lesson plays ... Benedick, unbeknownst to Beatrice, is smelling her hair from behind her, adoringly reveling in the fragrant aroma and all of his romantic thoughts of her.

I wish I could remember more about the interview and what was said, but it's all but lost from my memory. I do remember, however, shouting in my hotel room something like, "what I'd give for a VCR right now!"

A short while after tonight's production of the play, and Damian came out of the building with Joseph Millson, who plays Johan. In addition to me, there were two other people waiting for Damian tonight -- a young man and a young woman. I primarily waited from across the way over in the corner toward Riverside Walk, and when he came out and greeted that couple I waited briefly before slowly walking over, giving the couple some space and their opportunity to meet with him. I think they might have asked for autographs or something, or may have given him a gift or something , as Damian had a bag or case with him and at one point had put it down to put something in or get something out of it. As I approached, he saw me, recognized me, smiled at me and said, "Hi. Good to see you again. You okay?" I'm not quite sure what he meant -- I might have been limping a little or walking a bit strangely because of my blistered feet, so maybe he was asking because of that. Or perhaps he just meant was I all set or did I need to speak with him about something. In any case, I smiled and answered, "Yes. I'll see you tomorrow." He replied back, "Okay, see you tomorrow." I just thought that since he was with Joseph, and they were probably on their way somewhere, and they had already stopped to greet that couple, I didn't want to hold them up further. I was trying to be generous and not greedy or demanding. And I still had one more night. ...

I'm not sure which day this took place, so I'm adding it here. While I was in London, a "Ginger Ninja" was in the news, but this was not the "Ginger Ninja" you may be thinking of. Yes, in a print interview a few years or so back, Damian jokingly referred to himself as the "Ginger Ninja," and the name has kind of stuck. Well, sometime during my week in London, there was a news story that had nothing to do with Damian, but everything to do with that nickname. This news story was about Rebekah Wade (the editor of the Sun; she happens to have red hair) having assaulted her husband Ross Kemp (an actor featured in Eastenders). Well, one late night or early morning, I was in bed and had the TV on BBC News 24, and they were looking over and discussing newspaper headlines of the day. The male presenter held up The Times. The cover story was about that incident, and the headline had "GINGER NINJA" in it! As it turns out, several news sources have nicknamed her that! Freaky, huh?!

Friday, November 4

Friday was an emotional day for me. All day I found my self on the edge of tears, and some tears broke through, as I realized this was my last full day in London and I would have to leave in the morning. I felt like I was leaving home, rather than returning to it. I knew I would miss Damian -- that I had expected all along. But I didn't expect to fall in love with this city. I've never felt so at home anyplace I've ever lived or visited. This is not just the reaction of a tourist. I miss London terribly. I know I'll be back at some point. And if my dreams come true, I'll be back there to stay someday. ...

This final encounter on Friday night with Damian was splendid, but is hard to write about. I feel now, as I write it, as if my journey is coming to a close once again. I'm feeling tearful over its end, and also joyful at the memories. I was joyful and tearful that evening, and I feel the same now. ...

Tonight I was joined by Katerina, Debbie and also Maria, a third Yahoo Group member who had arrived in town earlier that day. Watching the play this time was bittersweet for me. I enjoyed it as much as I had all week, but this time, I was also fighting back the sad feeling and knowledge that I wouldn't be here in London tomorrow, I wouldn't be seeing this production again, and it would be some time before I see Damian in person after tonight (I should add "if ever" to that, but I can't really bring myself there. ....)

This time, there was a group of four other women at the stage door in addition to us. We presumed that quartet was there for the same reason our own foursome was, and we were right. As I had met him a few times and the other three in our group would have a chance Saturday, we agreed to hang back and give the other four women their turn first. Damian appeared at about the usual time, and he looked genuinely surprised to see so many people awaiting him at the stage door. He greeted that group -- they did the usual photographs and autographs and chit-chat. I overheard him tell them that he would be appearing on the This Morning show on Monday. Then we approached. He gave each of us -- I think each of us ... I know I was a recipient! -- a hug. I said to him something like, "I told you there'd be more of us coming this week," or "I told you friends would be joining me," or something like that -- I don't remember exactly.

With so many people, it's hard to recall everything. I am so-o-o-o glad that I at least had the sense to write notes each night before going to sleep.

Anyway Damian told us that [name omitted] (Damian's personal assistant) is leaving, and [name omitted] is taking her place. Debbie encouraged him to think about doing some theatre on Broadway, to for one thing make it easier for those of us in the States to come see him on stage. He said he is "seriously working on doing something on Broadway," but that was all he said about the subject.

Maria gave him a bottle of port, vintage 1971, and said that the custom in Portugal is to drink all of it on your next birthday, and you'll have good luck that whole year. He pointed out, "the play ends a week before my birthday." I responded, "That's right. You can have a double celebration." He echoed back, "Yes, a double celebration."

A hired car or cab arrived to take him home. I think it was Debbie who asked why he wasn't riding his bicycle home tonight. He replied that he had "cycled around a lot today" and his legs were "tired."

A bit further along in our encounter/conversation, he joked about the hired car/cab: "I've got to get going or he's going to charge me like 79 quid!" (Hey, Damian, I'm sure we all would have willingly chipped in to help pay the bill if it meant more time with you!)

As the encounter was apparently about to come to an end, I said, "This is my last night. I'm going back to the States in the morning, although I don't want to go. Could I get a photo together with you?" He was happy to do it, and I handed my camera to Maria, who took a splendid photo of the two of us.

After the photo, he hugged and kissed me on the cheek, and I did the same. (Ah!) I noticed that he had a tiny little bit of lipstick on his cheek, near his left sideburn. Not sure if it was from me or one of the other girls. I thought about wiping it off for him, but I thought it would be too forward of me to suggest such a thing.

For what seemed a few minutes afterward, he continued to hold onto me, rubbing his hand up and down my back. Nothing to read into there, folks -- it was a purely platonic gesture and nothing more. And before I realized it, I was doing the same with my hand on his back. It seems odd to say this, but it just seemed so entirely natural for both of us to do that.

It came time for the encounter to end, and as he stepped back toward the stage door to collect some things inside (I think including some flowers) that he'd left there while greeting all of us eight women, he turned to us smiling. I blew him a kiss goodbye as I began to walk away. .........

I wasn't paying much attention to this, but after Damian went inside, the other group of women gathered some information from our group about the Yahoo group and such. Then they left and we went over toward Riverside Walk with the goal of taking some group pictures of us.

We soon parted, and I began my final walk (for this visit, anyway) along Riverside Walk to my hotel. The mixed emotions were swelling and mixing and stirring like mad inside of me. And in this setting, and with what happened as I walked home, I felt like I was in the last scene of a film. As I walked under Waterloo Bridge, a train passed over it -- the railway sounds reminded me so very much of the ending of the play. I continued walking along, and a busker was playing one of my favorite classical pieces, Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata, on a keyboard. I started to cry. Then from across the Thames, Big Ben chimed 11 o'clock. I looked upon the light face of the clock and the softly lit clock tower, accompanied by the gently illuminated Houses of Parliament, as they together warmed the calm night sky. It felt to me like Big Ben was chiming for me as if to say "farewell and God speed" to me. I looked into Big Ben's lit face with tears in my eyes and a small smile on my face and replied, in a broken, tearful voice just above a whisper, "I'll be back." As walked further along and approached the London Eye, another busker was seemingly serenading me with his guitar and singing the Beatles song "Yesterday." More tears. Would I make it back to the hotel without falling completely to pieces? It wasn't getting any easier, but I was holding on as best I could. ... At long last, I reached my hotel, went up to my room, and let the feelings flow. ..............

Saturday, November 5

It was still dark early on Saturday morning, and quite cold outside, when I left the hotel and headed across Westminster bridge. I looked to the right down upon the Thames and over at the sights I'd viewed each night when walking up and down Riverside Walk to see Damian. My thoughts, if translated to words, were a combination of farewell and I'll see you again. I looked across to Big Ben and the Houses of Parliament. Old Ben now felt like an Old Friend to me. We spent a lot of time in each other's company that week. He escorted me home each night after I saw Damian on stage and afterward. Old Ben was privy to my feelings and thoughts, and he helps hold my memories in time. He chimes the beat of my heart now. If Tony Bennett can leave his heart in San Francisco, then I've left mine in London. ...

RETURN TO DAMIAN'S DOMINION

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